Stop eating disorder thoughts now – Part II

Two key tools to stop eating disorder thoughts

I hope you’re reading this with five hair ties around your wrist! Last week I wrote about the hair tie trick to stop eating disorder thoughts and how emotional and mental fitness are the most important in eating disorder recovery. This week I want to offer an additional two keys to stop eating disorder thoughts.

What makes us suffer is our thoughts. Our thoughts make us or break us.

What are the two other key tools that I used regularly during my recovery to crush the eating disorder and find a life of freedom?

Key 1 – WHITEBOARD IT

Make a weekly plan for your emotional fitness just like you would for a meal plan. Then, put it on a whiteboard that will you see every damn day.

Nothing happens without a plan. Every Sunday evening, write out a plan for the week. Focus on what you DO want versus what you DON’T want. Sometimes it’s tricky to shift a “don’t” into a “do”.

Do include actionable ways to feed your mind something good every damn day.

Write down 2 – 3 achievable goals (preferably on white board where you see it everyday). Make each goal measurable and realistic. Start small.

Remember, you are focusing on eating disorder thoughts. Resist the temptation to make the goals anything but thought related.

Example:

Monday: between 2-3pm: research a podcast, audiobook and book I want to read/listen to.

Tuesday: listen to the audio book for 10 minutes

Wednesday: read, for 15 minutes,  a non-ED book that is good for the mind and soul

Thursday: listen to the audio book for 10 minutes

Friday: before bed, read the book for 15 minutes

Key 2 – SERVE OTHERS

Do something for others. This seems simple. It’s not. To receive love, we have to first give love. Even to receive love from ourselves!

When we take ourselves and our issues out of the center, we shift our focus and as a result, our thoughts. This is a big deal!

There is scientific evidence that committing acts of kindness and serving others has a direct effect on our own self-regard.

Serving others can be as simple as sending out cards to people – former teachers, friends, family. Or you can get involved in your community, volunteering your time.

I recommend just taking the step of making a plan. No acting, just make a list of a few ways you could give to others. Then whiteboard it or dedicate a time to make some calls or get the supplies you need.

Celebrate each step in this journey. It’s not the end result that’s important – it’s your journey and who you become along the way.

 

Stop Eating Disorder Thoughts Now – Part I

Stop eating disorder thoughts

STOP EATING DISORDER THOUGHTS 

Ten years ago, eating disorder thoughts ruled my mind. Anorexia and bulimia said “you’re too fat. too stupid.” It seemed like every moment I was working on a scheme to secretly have eating disorder behaviors.

I’d create scenarios in my mind that weren’t true and I was constantly triggered by others. I felt hurt, left out. Worst of all, those  thoughts paralyzed me from acting.

When I started recovery, I did what most people did. I went to appointments. Tried therapy tools. I saw a dietician. And for seven years, I stayed stuck.

What was wrong?

THE SECRET TO STOPPING EATING DISORDER THOUGHTS

No one told me the SECRET:

Create goals around thoughts & beliefs. Everyone is so focused on stopping the behaviors, but the real magic comes in the mind.

Limiting thoughts and beliefs need to be tackled before anything else in ED recovery! Or else we’re just faking going through the motions with eating disorder thoughts.

If recovery isn’t going how YOU want and those negative thoughts keep screwing up the plan, this is for you.

If, when you hear people say “fake it til’ you make it”, you cringe, then this is for you.

A MUST-TRY TOOL TO MASTER YOUR MIND

The hair tie trick

Yes, hair ties! I originally learned about this as a parenting hack from Kelly Holmes, of The Idealist Mom. But then I applied it to my thoughts, which are the pre-cursor to any actions.

The hair ties are a visual recovery cue to break the patterns in your mind.  It’s simple.

1) First, find five hair ties that are comfortable to wear around your wrist. Any hair ties, any color will do.

2) When you wake up in the AM put those babies on your right wrist. All five of em.

3) Anytime you notice an ED thought OR have behaviors, you take one tie from your right wrist and move it to your left. NO judging allowed, just move the hair band.

4) Your goal is to end up with all five hair ties back on your right wrist. To earn back a hair tie, you must counter the behavior or thought with five positives for YOURSELF. (I’ll provide ideas at the end of this post).

BUT WHY? SEEMS A BIT SIMPLE AND SILLY

THIS IS POWERFUL. Don’t mistake the simplicity for effectiveness! There’s science in creating a ratio of 5:1 (positive to negative).

When I was in recovery, I tried keeping a rock in my pocket as a reminder and wearing a piece of jewelry. And… NOTHING. Didn’t help one bit.

I needed something more powerful – to create an actual habit to break the eating disorder thoughts. It’s almost like a game. A game where YOU come out the victor.

Within days or weeks you’ll notice not moving the ties from right to left as often.

Most of all, the visual cue and just feeling those bands on your wrist helps you stay really aware of what thoughts are in the mind.

COMMIT

Can you commit to trying this for three days?

If you’re up for trying this, just send an email saying “YES” to lindsay@outshininged.com or comment on the blog post “YES.”

I, or someone from my team, will check in personally with you via email to hear your experience and provide additional empowerment!

POSITIVES – EARNING A HAIR TIE BACK

It’s inevitable, those eating disorder thoughts will come. When you move one tie over from the right to left wrist, here are a list of positives to earn it back.

This is meant to be a long list and there are endless possibilities here. Make it your own.

Remember: 5 positives to earn 1 tie back.

– Take a bath or shower
– Paint your nails
– Listen to your favorite song
– Get dressed! (makeup if you’re into that or dressed like you’re meant to go somewhere)
– Go on a 10 minute walkSit in child’s pose for 5 minutes
– Write one nice thing to someone on FB or IG
– Close your eyes and take 10 deep breaths
– Play with a pet
– Listen to 3 minutes of a podcast you dig
– Call a friend
– Do something fun or new for 10 minutes

  • dance
  • paint
  • play music
  • color
  • yoga
  • swim
  • cook
  • arts & crafts
  • sew

– Write down a positive affirmation and say it five times
– Tape your affirmation on the wall
– Journal for 3 minutes (set a timer)
– Give your own feet a massage
– Better yet, just schedule a massage
– Make an appointment
– Make a plan to do something you’ve been putting off doing
– Better yet, start to do something you’ve been putting off doing
– Google ‘alternate nostril breathing’ and try it
– Tell yourself something positive, a strength you have
– Make a card and send it to a friend or family member
– Add two items to this list
– Read 3 pages of a book